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Rules I Don’t Know

by Page McConnell
The crew crept in closer, over-exposed
As they captured a couple frames more
The shots just got tighter and the reels run despite our
Last gasp on the cutting room floor

Attempts to resurrect the folding chairs on the deck
As the actors and cameras collide
The tears swept away, better I should stay
It’s why I might keep it inside

I watched as the flamethrower turned to my rainbow
To torch up my clean little shack
I sank as the reaper dug in even deeper
My sickle celebrity hack

Sensing the fear that I might disappear
With no mind over matters of fact
Defenses in their place, but still I couldn’t trace
Less than half of what caused the attack

How can I leave this behind me?
With all that’s around to remind me?
How can this road help unwind me
When it’s the road that I don’t go that defines me?

What do these questions provide me?
Why do these answers divide me?
How can I put this behind me
When it’s the tears that I don’t cry that define me?

Got my passport photo, had it taken today
Not the best one I’ve seen, but it should get me away
I’m in a situation and the color’s grey
It’s been such a long time that I’ve been feeling this way
Wouldn’t be so bad but seems like every third day
I see the same old movie and it always ends the same

And the soundtrack starts rewinding
To a part not far behind me
I try not to let much get by me
But it’s the rules I don’t know that define me

How can I leave this behind me?
With all that’s around to remind me?
How can this road help unwind me
When it’s the rules I don’t know that define me?